Because I realize now that there is never a time of total escape from some type of "problem" that seemingly hangs over my head.
Next Tuesday I'm set for surgery. A complete hysterectomy. And what I'm feeling is paradoxical. I feel both fear and trust. Both swirl in my thoughts and feelings. How to be present to that? I know that being present is essential. The last big surgery I had was a little over five years ago, a … Continue reading Surgery: Fear and Trust
We've probably all been there. Your life is perking along. You're feeling "normal" - perhaps you even think your life is "good." And then something unexpected tilts your world. It might be a death, or something health-related, or someone tells you something that changes everything. And suddenly all that seemed "normal" five minutes ago looks … Continue reading A little post about welcoming fear
All of us have been through some kind of wounding situation that put us on a healing path. It might have been a badly sprained ankle, a deep cut that required lots of stitches, surgery of some sort, a heart attack, the death of a friend or loved one, a divorce, cancer, a lost friendship, … Continue reading Why does healing take SO LONG?
I start to feel panicky. I'm sweating. And I have to calm myself again.
I know I'm the teacher, but in this situation I'm just as much a learner as my students are.
And perhaps even more so.
What is it about September and cancer diagnosis for me? I got a breast cancer diagnosis in September 2011 - and this September it's skin cancer. A couple of weeks ago, my dermatologist and his assistant both said the place above my elbow was a basal cell carcinoma. The tech scraped it out and sent … Continue reading Biopsies and Prescience: Cutting Cancer
About three months ago, I got the feeling I was completing a cycle. That something is finishing within me, that something is shifting, that I'm about to emerge into something new. I realized that it was seven years ago that I quit teaching and embarked on a new life. I also realized that I've read … Continue reading A 7 Year Cycle: Failure and Fear
April 24th is a kind of birthday for me. It's the day I completed breast cancer treatments. And fittingly, this year's local Relay for Life is on April 25th. So I'm looking at this year's Relay event as a "birthday" celebration of my third year as a cancer-free person. But I'm not only feeling celebration … Continue reading An Upcoming “Birth”day: Three Years After Cancer Treatments
Just a quick post today to acknowledge the three-year anniversary of my breast cancer diagnosis. I was terrified that day three years ago. I numbly went through an MRI and PET scan that week (or the next. It all ran together). And then port surgery and right into chemo for eight weeks. And a lumpectomy … Continue reading Another anniversary